Helen Forve O'Leary

Helen Forve O’Leary

11/15/1927 – 1/25/2025

Helen, known to most as Tibby, was born in Pasadena, California, to Edwin Victor and Helen Dakin Forve. She had a happy childhood, living across the street from grandparents Henry and Helen Ide Dakin and surrounded by loving Forve and Dakin relatives. Tibby attended Mayfield and Westridge Schools, and in 1949 she graduated from Vassar College, where she majored in cultural anthropology. She maintained close friendships from all three institutions. Tibby then moved to San Francisco, where she met her husband, Paul A. O’Leary, and developed more lifelong friendships. Paul and Tibby married in 1952 and moved shortly thereafter to Singapore, where Paul continued his career in international trade. The couple was transferred to New York, where Tibby became close to Paul’s extended family and made a home in Rye. Their last transfer brought Tibby and Paul back to San Francisco, which Tibby came to feel was “always home”— even after the couple eventually relocated to Smith Ranch Homes in San Rafael. Raising seven children and hosting helpers from around the world, Tibby also took great interest in the many international visitors her husband’s career enabled her to meet and learn from. She felt privileged to travel with Paul throughout Asia, and later to visit her three daughters at their homes in France, Pakistan, Nepal, Jordan, Bahrain, Egypt, and India. Always concerned about injustice, civil rights, climate change, poverty and educational inequity, Tibby volunteered for causes that she cared about and participated in protests into her 90s.  She particularly flourished as a volunteer for many years at St. Anthony’s Dining Room — an experience that strengthened her already-formidable social conscience.

Tibby was predeceased by her husband Paul (2017) and sons Mark (1985) and Stephen (2020) as well as her only sibling, Anne Forve Neville (2018). She is survived by five children: Anne (Russell), Clare, Paul (Kathi), Kate (Bastien), Richard (Amy), and her eight grandchildren. The family plans a funeral Mass and burial at St. Mary Magdalene Church in Bolinas on Friday, April 4th at 2:30pm, and a celebration of life the following day in their home in Point Reyes. In lieu of flowers, the O’Learys suggest contributions to St. Anthony Foundation,150 Golden Gate Avenue, San Francisco 94102, or to a charity of one’s choice.

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